Living in a nightmare, with no idea how to get out of it.

Hello world. The following was written 7/12/2015.

I was looking at some of the things I was experiencing and feeling regarding the situation we found ourselves in with our home. How lost and angry I felt at the situation we found ourselves in. The nightmares we go through on our journeys which have us tied in knots, confused at all we experience.

Yesterday I woke up feeling sick to my stomach. I was able to eat some toast before heading out to spend the day with my family. We were celebrating my Mother and my Aunt’s birthdays. On the drive out with the family I found myself hanging out of the car tossing my cookies. We had to stop five times for me to unleash my stomach on the road. I haven’t gotten car sick like that, in years.

This morning I woke up at 6 AM. I found myself worshiping the porcelain God until about 7:30 AM. I finally fell back asleep, until around 10 AM. Even now, my stomach is trying to protest the toast I have eaten. Add to this, the drama unfolding in our personal lives and I ask myself, is it any wonder I am feeling so sick inside.

We have been living in a nightmare, with no idea how to get out of it. Our “lender” lost the contract for the purchase of this house within months of us signing it. We installed solar panels, appliances and did some fixing up of the place before we could move in. In the lenders mind, there is now NO contract. In their mind, this makes us a renter. Without a copy of the contract we don’t…